We Are More Than Our Behavior

It is very important that spouses, friends, and family of borderlines NOT consider borderlines to be "things" that have to be "dealt with" or "handled" (as in "how do you deal with a borderline?" or "how do you handle a borderline?"). We are people. We are more than our behavior. We have feelings. We feel pain, more so than most people (and that's not just my opinion, that's also the opinion of a researcher at NIMH I was referred to a couple of years ago). Our behavior is the result of our pain and our feelings. THESE are the things about us that have to be considered...just as though we were regular human beans with feelings and pain. I think the operative word is EMPATHY. Family and friends should try to put themselves in borderline shoes, because borderline behavior (and borderline feelings) are not much more than bizarre exaggerations of normal behavior and feelings.