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Book
Review for "Stop Walking on Eggshells" (SWOE)
(The
following is a review of the booklet Walking
on Eggshells that was fully expanded into Stop
Walking on Eggshells. The review was printed in the newsletter
"Update," printed by the Alliance from the Mentally
Ill from Greater Milwaukee
by
Shana Broderick, Alliance for the Mentally Ill.
Walking
on Eggshells
is essential reading for those who know, love, or live with persons
with borderline personality disorder. This booklet answers many
questions about the erratic and often confusing behavior of the
borderline personality. It sheds much needed light on the illness
and provides specific way ways in which in to cope.
Many
relatives and loved ones feel manipulated, controlled, and continually
criticized by person with BPD.
Friends
and family report being swept away in storms of intense anger,
rage, unreasonable and accusations. As a result, they frequently
feel trapped or helpless and may withdraw into depression, self-doubt,
and hopelessness — common, but unhealthy reactions to the
BPD behavior.
Borderline
personality disorder is characterized by the following longstanding
and persistent behaviors: frantic efforts to avoid abandonment;
unstable sense of self; impulsiveness in potentially self-damaging
behavior; suicidal/self-mutilating behavior; moodiness; irritability;
anxiety; chronic feelings of emptiness; and inappropriate, intense
anger.
People
with this illness have trouble managing their emotions, trusting
others, and being alone. They often use ineffective defensiveness,
such as denial, rationalization, blaming, and projection to protect
the self from pain and emptiness.
This
book gives the tools needed to cope successfully with the moods
and behaviors that typify the typical BPD. It offers ten steps
that will help friends and family regain control over their lives
while supporting their loved one's recovery. These steps include
taking care of oneself, getting support from others, learning
to stop interpreting the BPD behavior as personally directed,
assuming responsibility for one's own behavior only, and using
special communication skills.
The
authors offer a hopeful prognosis for those with BPD who accept
responsibility for their behavior and their recovery, and who
are willing to work through their pain in constructive ways. Learning
to act in healthier ways can result in a more hopeful, less depressed
outlook and can lead to increased satisfaction with relationships.
The
full, 250-page expanded book based on the booklet is available
in bookstores or by calling 1-888-35-SHELL.
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